It Takes More Courage to Mend a Fence Than to Burn a Bridge

Today I did something I have consciously been avoiding for 3 years. Each time it popped in my mind and I did nothing, I felt a rising guilt. Knowing I was not doing the right thing, by indulging my anger, I cut off a very important person in my life. It has gotten so I can't even remember why. I know I was mad, or something, but about what I don't recall.
I just found out that this person has been having quite a spot of bother lately and probably could have used all the friendship he could get. I did not know this until I received an item in the mail from a family member of his indicating these facts.
My friend's home was open to me for a long time as a second home. More than once for a protracted period of time. It was not easy on his situation either time, though he allowed it mostly without issue.
In return, I decided to enforce convention in our relationship suddenly and without warning where no convention had previously existed. This sudden addition of rules and regulations that I applied unilaterally effectively ended our friendship. Actually it was more like turning my back on a brother, which I believe is a mortal sin in all but a few cases. In my case, a mortal sin.
I went so far as to ignore or rebuff two attempts from my friend to make amends. Because again, the efforts were not to my satisfaction. I was able to keep my anger and amplify it with self-righteousness.
But, the letter from the mailbox finally pushed me over. I sent my apology which I hope puts the matter at peace. I don't know if I will have a friend at the end of all this, but at least I confessed to my humanity and recognized my culpability.
So, what did we learn today, children? For one, when God is telling you something with that voice, that commanding voice and you ignore it... Well, you'll be sorry. Because for as powerful as God is, we as flawed humans seem to have an ignorance greater than the influence of God. Human ignorance is like God-kryptonite. Short of sending Sonny Corleone to beat me with the top of a trash can in the city streets, God could not have done more persuading that he did. I just did not listen. In fact, I DID listen and I simply did not DO.
What else? Some relationships, like familial relationships defy the conventions that govern so many of our more casual relationships. Applying those rules to a relationship that has transcended that level is selfish and never positive. When you have those few people in your life who you love beyond measure, it is o.k. not to like them sometimes. But you must shake your head, count to 10, or 100 or 1,000 and go back in again for if you do not, you are the failure, not them.
Lastly, there is but limited time here on this Earth to master this thing called living. I personally believe we only get one chance. I am glad my time is not up yet, for I have a lot to learn.

Peace.