Everyone is bitching about the President going on vacation during a time of crisis in our country. I say, lay off. This is the perfect time to take vacation. Our problems will still be here for him to be not able to fix when he gets back. Except they'll be even bigger. They were going to get bigger anyway, so why not take a couple weeks at the end of summer to decompress for the busy season ahead?
I am talking of course about campaign season. Believe you me, this is a great time to have a crisis. Everyone in Washington wants to be the one to point fingers as to the cause of our national crisis-es, then explain how they have the right plan to fix our national crisis... But they can't tell us what it is until we elect them.
Besides, when has our country not been in crisis? I am a member of the instant factoid, info-tainment, Fox News generation so I don't check facts; but if I did I think I would see that every sitting president has presided over some sort of crisis and none have canceled their vacations. The news only used to report when Bill Clinton was at the White House. That man got around, (the world that is) and no one seemed to complain about that!
They take the whole shooting match with them anyway, people. This would be the worst vacation you could conceive of. Imagine you were the president of a major corporation and to take vacation you had to bring the entire board of directors and your executive management team with you and meet with them for hours every day. Later, if it didn't rain, you could catch a round of golf with an old school buddy of yours that you flew in just to see you, except now he's only a manager and you are the big kahuna and you find it is awkward and you have almost nothing to talk about. On top of this, all your shareholders are there, surrounding you everywhere you go taking pictures and wanting to talk about share price!
Miserable!
Which is exactly the vacation any Washington politicians deserve right now. A miserable one.
I want Stenny Hoyer's Winnebago to pop a flat on Pike's Peak and Barney Frank's hot air balloon to ascend to great heights because he can't stop talking (hot air, get it?).
I want them all to get sunburned - a mere preview of what is in store for many of them should they not change their ways.
I want the mistresses and the wives to be having tea when Mr. Big Shot walks into the drawing room.
I hope Carl Levin loses the Benjamin Franklin look-alike contest he has been practicing for for years.
And as for you, Dutch Ruppersberger, (O.K. I admit I looked that one up), I hope you get a toothpick under your fingernail after eating crab and getting all that crap under your fingernails and trying to clean it out with a toothpick, even though your wife tells you she has the fingernail cleaner thing in her purse but you use the toothpick anyway and poke yourself. Then it starts to bleed a little and hurt really bad and even though you are smiling while eating the ice cream cone all you can think of is "damn, this really hurts" and then realize it's going to leave a big black blood clot under the nail and it's the hand you shake with and people will be grossed out by you for weeks.
Ron Paul - I like you. Dial back the crazy just a notch and you have earned another devotee in me. You have a nice week off. Take some time and scribble some errant thoughts on the back of a cocktail napkin and call it a stump speech. Have your family make some crude signs with esoteric slogans that only 10 people in America get and only 4 of them appreciate. Read Pat Paulsen's Autobiography. Read it again. Repeat.
I say, go ahead, lawmakers. Take all the vacation you want. Disappear for all we care. You got us into this, maybe it is time we start getting us out of it. Go f*ck up your golf game for awhile. Leave my country alone.
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