Wisdom in Gaming

On Mille Bournes

For those of you who don't know what Mille Bornes is, it's a card game where basically you are trying to win by getting to 1000 miles. You do this by having luck, cunning, the ability to cheat and a good sense for the fine balance of offense versus defense. (As an aside, everyone who reads this blog was playing the game with me today, and the one who wasn't, Hi Mom!, definitely knows the game, so this blentry is going to be pretty worthless.)

A game like this demostrates just how willing we become to quash, slow, waylay or otherwise stop the progress of our competitors at the merest hint of impending success. It is apropos that this game was invented by the French. First of all, trying to go 1000 miles in a French car is indeed an undertaking of epic proportions, and secondly it is just like the French to launch an attack on an enemy and then sulk when you are retaliated against. Which is exactly how one tends to get when they play this game.

Odd, that this game is only fun if there is effective defense. Vitriolic, mean spirited, aggressive defense meant to degrade, derail and demoralize is the only fun. Imagine everyone going out of their way to be courteous and helpful so that everyone can achieve their goal. BORING! Screw that, I want to watch your face as I blow out your tire with nothing but the power of my whimsy. I am God! Until you come back and put me in a ditch and I feel like I am the victim in some Greek tragedy.

We all know some people in this world, be they friends or coworkers who seem to go out of the way to make yours, or others' lives difficult. We wonder at why. To what end do they benefit by being pernicious? Maybe they are just bored. I have to admit, I've started arguments or played devil's advocate just to chase away the monotony of the day. I just think it would be best if we saved our evil tendencies for the card games.

A Game of a Different Stripe

Dave and I decided to play Call of Duty last night. He got it last year as a gift but was so intimidated by the thought of playing it, that he never even took it out of the plastic. We decided wanted to shoot at stuff, which is not uncommon, and decided to play.

Two words. In Tense! First of all, I couldn't even walk since the controls are so foreign to me. Video games are something I avoid in general, given the fact that I suffer from a plague known as Hyper-Competitive Deuchebag Disorder or HCDD for short. It is also known colloquially as Booya's disease, since people with HCDD tend to yell that exhortation more often that it would be normally appropriate in the lexicon. So the learning curve was high.

It was frustrating to know that I, a licensed gun holder couldn't hit the broad side of a barn in this stupid game, let alone walk. I can walk and shoot in real life. I can even do both at the same time! So, I ask you, 14 year old who has mastered this game... which of us is a better friend to have when you find yourself in a dark dead end alley in Tijuana? Where's your Wii now, Moses?

And yet, I feel like a failure because I am too stupid and uncoordinated to play this game. So, after three hours, we decided to give up. It was clear our unit didn't want us around anyway, since we were ultimately killed by friendly fire, after being invited to a backroom poker game that degraded into a match of Russian Roulette. Oh, wait, that's a movie. Sorry, I have a hard time keeping my pop culture references straight anymore. It's too hard to ascertain real from manufactured these days.

Either way, I feel like I have learned a positive lesson in this weekend's bout of game play. Save it for the court, or the board, or the game console. Be benevolent in life and malevolent on the field of battle. This way you are loved and respected in equal measure as a person and an opponent.