Bill Uebbing, Professional. Bad Ass. Zombie Killer.

I actually had a protracted dream in full technicolor and Cinema Surround the other night that the zombie apocalypse had finally arrived. I was the only one in the group of Helens and Nancys who would, or even could save the day.

It started innocently enough, as the group of strangers I was with and I broke into a gun store and looted the place. Long guns, pistols... ammo, ammo, ammo. We took as much as we could carry.
For some reason, a nearby funeral home was deemed the most hardened place to hide out and defend. Not a bad idea, except for all the recently dead who were waking back up.

First we had to defend from the inside... Firing volleys on the undead and watching them explode with the awesome firepower of my shotgun. Then, after stacking the recently dead-cum zombie-cum really really dead, like cordwood, we began to defend the permiter.
Long story short, we won. We, (I), since the people I was with were entirely worthless killed all the zombies we could find.

Weird dream.

And unprecedented for me. I rarely have bad or violent dreams. This one, while it seems violent at first blush, was really more entertaining and campy. I knew I was dreaming the whole time and just never stopped it. I was having fun watching myself be Bill Uebbing. Professional. Bad Ass. Zombie Killer.
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Can't we get on with this whole Christmas thing? I just want a reliable and broadly accepted excuse to stop working and still get paid! I have been too busy, which is good. Some of the most productive weeks of the year so far, actually.

The owner of my company, (who is also a friend), said he loves the holidays, but hates how it is such a distraction and a detriment to productivity. Oh how I wish. I could use the break!
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I am a smart, stupid person. Going back and reading some recent post leads me to be shocked and appalled at the lack of quality and bush-league mistakes! The same that I mercilessly poke fun at others for. <---- Like ending sentences with prepositions.

While I do not purport this blog as a quality piece, (quite the contrary, actually), I shall do my best to watch the misuses, misspellings, etc. Thanks for not making fun of me to my face. Of course now that you know I am a Professional. Bad Ass. Zombie Killer. You are less apt to do so. At least I assume as much.