Emily and I went out to Las Vegas to surprise my Dad for his birthday, which is actually December 2nd. We did the same for my Mom back in January and we had such a good time, that we resolved there and then to do the same thing for Dad.
And we again had a great time. Traveling by air, anymore a crap-shoot where crashing into the ground in a fireball isn't even the worst thing that could conceivably happen, was a non-event. At least where logistics and safety were concerned.There's always the passengers themselves to contend with.
The nice young lady entered the door of the plane and I knew she was going to be a problem to the flight crew. She was, after all, outfitted like a sherpa with unending attachments and bags teeming from her person. She was petite, but due to the baggage she was bouncing into each and every person in rows 1-19. We were in row 20.
Hello new seat mate.
And so, after a brief but terse conversation with the cabin attendant to consolidate some of the bags, she sat down. It was then I noticed the one large bag was actually a pet carrier. She had a cat. No problem, I have cats. I like cats. The cat wasn't making noise, didn't stink and fit nicely under the seat ahead of her. She was nice enough to ask, as we were rolling down the runway if we were ok with cats. That was nice of her.
So the cat was no problem, but my new friend was made of arms and elbows and in spite of her small size, seemed to be all over my personal bubble. This reality was happening. To me. In spite of the fact I was halfway on Emily, with my back spanning the armrest between us that spent the entire flight in its upright and locked position.
I mostly got used to that. it was when she began to start spraying a juniper smelling spray every five minutes or so into her face that got to me.
"Oh, did I spray you?" she asked. "Sorry."
How could you not? You're practically sitting in my lap! At least she apologized the first time. The subsequent 200 times we freebies apparently.
I don't like the smell of juniper. She said at the end of the flight it was for the cat, to keep him calm. I didn't buy it. The cat was fine the entire time. She said it was Lavender spray... It smelled like gin to me. Which is fine, because as much as I dislike juniper, I really hate lavender.
She was a nice young woman, I imagine about Emily's age. When she
wasn't sleeping and we weren't watching our movie, we spoke pleasantly.
The movie we rented on the iPad, Dark Shadows was only so-so. I am sure with a larger screen some of the visual pizazz would have helped overcome what was ultimately a poorly executed story that was well-acted. My earbuds were cheapos that I bought in an airport and they are also extremely uncomfortable.
While out in Vegas, I looked for cheap noise cancelling headphones. I found them, at $30.00 apiece. That's pretty cheap so I didn't expect much.
We boarded the plane for our trip home and sat about 10 rows in front of a family with three young children. The wailing began immediately. As soon as the 'bong bong' indicated that we hit 10,000 feet and we could use electronic devices, Emily and I fairly dove into our bags to pull out the headsets.
What a revelation. I know these aren't "good" headphones. I know there are others on the market for even $85 apiece that are truly quality devices. But I didn't hear that baby crying the rest of the trip except when I would flip that toggle switch and turn off the noise cancelling, just to let in a little of the world.
"Whaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa".
Yep. Still there.
We watched "The Candidate" which it was pretty clear I enjoyed as I was getting 'the look' from my fellow passengers each time I would laugh aloud. I think they were probably just taking their anger for the wailing out on me as I sat in my pleasant cocoon of adolescent comedy.
I saved $60.00 in alcoholic beverages on this trip alone by buying these cheap headphones. I highly recommend them, no matter how inexpensive.
We touched down on the runway in a cloud socked Detroit. A little high I thought. I am one of those that can time the touchdown as I am very into flight. I really get into approach and landing. I am, in short, a nerd.
And so I counted my five... four... three... two... one.... taking away one finger until I pantomimed landing with my flattened palm.
I was dismayed that I was a second... maybe even a second-and-a-half too fast.
As I was remarking to Emily about this, the wheels, directly beneath our row began to lockup squeal. That's not a noise you want to hear. The antiskid system kicked in and we started to change direction rapidly. I could see out the starboard side that the pilot was trying to make the first high-speed turnoff. I was putting it all together now... I didn't count wrong, he landed high and fast.
It seemed to me as I was looking at the lights that he had actually stopped faster than he thought and we were now sort of transversely on the runway. Now what?
Since we were over the wing, I saw the starboard thrust reverser engage and heard the port engine spool up and we sort of backed up a little and got onto the taxi way. There were a number of planes in the pattern and I imagine not a lot of time to take evasive action. So, all things considered, they did a good job getting us off the runway.
Onto a one was taxi way. Going the wrong way.
We were now playing chicken with a DELTA MD80.
Long story short... (Too late)... We made it to the gate. I wanted to give the pilot a little good natured ribbing. But instead of standing up front at the flight deck door, graciously accepting plaudits for a job well done, the pilots apparently decided to get out of Dodge.
Long enough post for now. There's so much more I have to say about people in airports and on planes and whatever. It's all very funny. So, just suffice it to say you would enjoy it much and attribute those good feelings to me. Thanks.
No comments:
Post a Comment